1. |
B Fun Demo
01:03
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2. |
Break Your Fall
01:05
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Way before I met you, I was so lonely. Said I was okay. Said that I was waiting for the right one, then you came my way. I told myself I shouldn't rush into something with somebody I met at my day job that I hated. What if I just get hurt or I hurt somebody else?
Then I told you I couldn't kiss you because it wouldn't seem right, and you said "it's okay." We listened to tunes and stayed up all night. Before I knew it, we were in each others arms. I couldn't keep the reins on my emotions like I planned to. What's the point of breaking your fall into love?
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3. |
Breaking the Habit
02:58
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I won't ask you to pretend you want to be with me, or defend the endless masquerading misery. With your solitude I'll set you free, and sister, you can bet I'll be alone with thoughts of you. But I've got other things to do.
I won't come around at night if you don't want me to, or telephone you with a stupid joke in the afternoon. I won't feel your warmth at dawn when I wake to your alarm. I suppose I'm waking now. It's unimportant anyhow.
I can act like I don't mind your self-imposed exile, and I think it's healthy to be by myself awhile. But as darkness around me creeps, to your memory I'm leaping, quick as a rabbit. Breaking the habit.
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4. |
Nuisance
02:34
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I feel like a nuisance to everyone around me. I feel like a nuisance to everyone I know, believe me. Talking all about my problems, talking about things they probably can't stand to hear. Oh, I bore them all to death.
I can tell a story that no one wants to hear. I can guarantee you'll go far when I am near. Oh, please god, tell me that my jokes are funny. Sorry man, I got no money. I'll pay you back by the time that you forgot.
I feel like a nuisance to all my books and clothing. I feel like a nuisance to all of my CD's and records. Spending all their precious time wishing that they weren't mine. Today's the day that I finally start a fire.
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5. |
Should I Try
03:04
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Should I try to explain the way my heart is crashing like a plane, with my wings spinning 'round, and counting down until I hit the ground? Can I trust the way I feel? Will I miss the reveal? Should I spill it all across the floor? Confess the mess, or rest forevermore?
Could I try to believe that every day is like a summer breeze? Without worry and pain, and only all the warmth and light remains? Though the warmth is getting worse since the start of this verse. I can't stand it anymore. Called the fire department. No response, it's been burned down.
Oh, I never knew it could be so easy to slip, and suddenly, I am falling so freely through a sky without a ground. I'm running round in circles chasing someone through the wings. He's dressed an awful lot like me and breaking all my things. Is this a dream?
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6. |
Stressed
02:21
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Feel stressed out because you didn't do the thing you were going to do today. Chasing down ideas that were chasing you around yourself the other day. Kill the serpent swallowing itself. Take a shower, make the bed, go for another walk in daylight.
Waiting for the person that you love to get off work so you can see them soon. Daydreaming of the dead aim with which they shot you through the heart with a harpoon. Talking to yourself about the voices talking to you from the cold, black telephone, knowing that you're alone. Nothing's set in stone until it is.
Wishing that cosmic wit would shower over me. No wait, it did, but I just wasn't listening. I'm cleaning up my room to make room in my head for all the good ideas I've been dying to share with you.
Oh, thought of this one. I think you're gonna like it but I don't know what to do for lyrics, but the melody is good. Sick of the songs about feeling so sorry for myself. Sorry about writing so many songs about myself.
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7. |
His Own Place
02:09
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Follow him at a distance of twenty five paces pausing once every so often when he stops. He's on his way back home, the same route that he takes every day, turning at the old corner shop. When he's inside I see him draw the curtains nervously. He thinks maybe he's only paranoid. I know he knows deep in his gut our final meeting is something he can postpone but can't avoid.
Go on and walk your maze you're building day by day. I'm patient, I can sit and wait.
Did I see a shadow standing there? Did you hear me coming up the stairs? Maybe it's only your imagination playing tricks on you, or maybe someone moved the plant. And when he feels my breath on the back of his neck, he makes a move to run away but knows he can't
Hardly believes my eyes, like a mirror staring back into his face. I tell him not to cry. It's my turn to take his own place.
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8. |
The End
03:09
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Say the things you need to be honest with yourself. Make it into what you could love without some help. Go to the places that you want to. Surround yourself with friends. All I could know is the end.
Paint it how you see it, in all your shades of black. Wait until you need it, and never looking back, fake all the things you really need to, and this I will defend: All I could know is the end.
Break apart the fantasy. Erase the line between you and me. Chasing the person I wanted to be 'round and 'round.
Break your life up into the small convenient parts. Never find an ending until you find a start. Wait for the things you feel you need to. Sit and play pretend. All I could know is the end.
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9. |
Destined
00:40
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Destined to be alone. Nobody else, all by myself. No talking. Destined to be alone. Some faded fear now that you're near. I wave goodbye.
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10. |
Guy in My Head
01:40
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There's this guy that I let in my head long ago, and he said "you should never feel good about things that you do." All that I know is I can't get him out of this place no matter what I do.
All his clothes are on the floor, and his dishes in the sink. I just can't sleep a wink through his incessant drum solo in the kitchen.
I used to think I was just good for one thing. I used to think I wasn't good. Now I don't know what goodness is or isn't. Now I hardly know what I am.
All my woes are on the floor, and ambitions in the sink. I don't know what to think of my incessant drum solo in the kitchen.
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11. |
Second Verse
02:29
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I've been here ten times before. I know that I said that eleven times, no, wait, twelve. Whatever, I meant it. Maybe if I walk a straight line instead of spiraling, I'd walk my way 'round the earth and end up right back here.
They took the paintings off the walls of the Louvre. Removed the needle from its home in the groove. Thought that I could do the same thing but I know I'm wrong. Tried to write it out in a song. I'm working hard to come up with the details for it.
I've been here ten times before. I know that I said that. The second verse same as the first, or maybe the chorus. I'm not talking to myself, you're talking to yourself. You're not listening to me, you're talking to yourself.
While walking backward just to see how it feels, took off your headphones and then heard it for real. Thought you're on the fifth until the sixth. "I know you're wrong." Tried to write it out in a song. I'm working hard to come up with the details for it.
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12. |
Only Kidding
02:42
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When I think of it, my heart is racing. Upside looking down. I can't help the way it's palpitating. I'm embarrassed by the sound. They're all laughing, they're all laughing at me, pointing in my face. Sixty four long years worried that I would somehow end up in this place.
I'm not trying to be funny this time, but if you're still laughing then it's all right. No, it's a joke, I am only kidding. What a way to waste all my time-- Parched, wondering if it's safe to drink the water.
Cast another glance over my shoulder walking home today. Though I couldn't see him, I could sense him following in his special way. Can I talk about it? I can talk about it later on? Can I write about it? I can write about it in another song. Yellowed pages and the screensaver's on now.
Called the office and made a date. Two weeks from now, I'll just have to wait. Wring my hands while the symptoms change, telling myself that I'm just exaggerating.
It's a joke, I'm only kidding. It's a dream that I'm forgetting.
It's a new day, at least that's what I'll say. Another me will take my place.
It's a new day, at least that's what I'll say. Another me will take my place.
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13. |
Every Day
03:34
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When I walk, I see people and dogs that are tethered together, and, light as a feather, my heart starts to yearn for the things I have learned are not easy, and freely, I walk down the street.
And though I know companionship is difficult and nice, like all good things, it's coming with a price. And when you least expect it all the ice will break, and you'll fall into love.
Every day I feel bad or okay or excited and wonderful. Sit in the sun and feel like I'm a part of the world I create that is greater than me and the things that I see in my apartment or outside, like dogs and all the people walking 'round in circles in my heart is pumping blood and oxygen into my head through which I breathe until I'm dead.
There's a black cloud that's floating overhead. It looks like rain. I think of pain, though all the plants will be glad to have some water on their leaves. The grass and trees are cheering.
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14. |
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I need a problem or I'm stuck. Keep me from the thing that I love. It's the way I feel I'm enough.
"The water's been poisoned," I gasp, falling down. I'm certain the chessboard has been turned around. I know it's the truth. I know they know I know. Been carving a tooth out of a placebo.
I'm printing pamphlets on the dangers of the pamphlet and I've stapled all the doors shut through the window. I burned the safehouse down and scattered ashes all around the safehouse monument committee's driveway. I know everything the thought I never wanted to. Wanted everything the know I never thought I knew. Forgot the details and destroyed all the proof.
The body's writhing on the floor, chained no more. I've settled the score. Though the ink stains remains a door.
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Comfy Rochester, New York
Connor "thanks for the ride" Benincasa & friends
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